Thursday, October 25, 2012

The Path

For the past few years I have been living in a large body of water. I came here not realizing the moment I jumped in, 
                                     I would be stuck.

 And that's what I've lived;                    swimming,
                                                                                swimming without a destination. Do you know how exciting and dangerous that can be?
                                                          The water is clouded and only here and there are rays filing through.
I surfaced as I momentary do,
                             my vision cleared,      
                                                        what seemed to be an island appeared within a small distance from me.
Land?
Was it solid?
Could it hold me?

I groped to the edge, and brought myself to stand on shaking limbs. Solid ground! My face lit up in a grin and my hands stretched to the heavens.
                                                                                            "Whoa!" I gasped. Then I was speechless. With eyes wide open I looked around in awe. Bright red, a purple structure, a large plant twisting upward reaching for approaching stars. I began looking around me almost frantically, overcome with wonder I sank to the ground and took everything in.
I was surrounded by many, many mansions though well-kept they appeared vacant. I felt a familiar sensation fill my being. "Damnit, curiosity." I muttered and against common sense rose to my feet. Shivers colored my body, this world had an energy unfamiliar to me but I was surprisingly comfortable. With cautious steps I made my way toward a mysterious looking pathway. Several paces down a particular mansion stood out as interesting. Maroon shutters with matching cutouts of dobermans artistically accenting the tan color siding.
As I drew closer a movement in the window caught my attention. An old woman with grey locks, was watching me, as though I was a comedy show her interest sparked me to acknowledge her. She smiled with a wave and proceeded to shut the floral curtains that graced the window.
Was I living a dream? The atmosphere was eerie, and smelled of moist and decaying earth matter. Nothing like this had ever happened to me before, I thought that being transferred from world to world was just for fictional tales, but it was my reality right now! Goosebumps covered my skin, glancing down I spotted a trio of mushrooms growing under a large oak. Stooping down I plucked one, and studied the intricate gills. So small, so beautiful. How was it made? Where did come from?
Deep in thought I barely noticed the sound of something or someone approaching. I looked up to see a small monkey on a red tricycle, he rides up and stops. He was bashful and it took him a moment to peek at me from under his helmet. When he finally got some nerve his face split into a big grin and he began squeaking with excitement.
"Hey buddy!" I smiled, struck by his appearance.
"Whoo hahaha eeekk!" He grinned again. "Hello!"
This monkey talks! Or rather, I can understand this monkey talk! Heart pounding, I motioned to the fungi I had found "Did you see these mushrooms?"
He ignored my question, "This my tricycle, I like to ride it." He lisped perfectly.
"I like it a lot, I used to have a tricycle much like that years ago when I was young."
"Yeah, well sometimes they stop." He demonstrated by desperately stomping on the peddle, trying to get the wheels to budge without success. He was obviously getting frustrated, but the cheesy grin never left his face. I was getting ready to assist, when whatever was was holding his tire intact loosened freeing my little friend.
"Whooo hahaha!" his laugh impelled me to join in as his peddled away with a wave.


"I'm so happy to be alive!" I yelled as loud as I could and took off running for a great distance until the path ended at a wall of which I could not see the top. It reached to the sky and beyond, the whole distance of it covered in lush ivy and grape vines. 
                                                                     There was a peculiar looking door leading to the unknown.   

                                        Without thought I opened this door and walked through shutting it behind me.

                                                              This was my mistake because....
                                                                                                           there was no door on the other side. I looked around in dismay.

                                           I was in an old warehouse.

I walked amid broken glass and bricks to look out of a single window that was the only                      

                                                                                                                             light
                                                                                                                                    source.

                                From this vantage point ...

Water....slowly morphing into a mirror, in which I stared into the eyes of a beautiful old woman, as tears flowed as she smiled, "You can do this."

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

The Battle

Crawling in dark tunnels, searching, searching for the light you told me I'd find. I've been here for so long, that I have lost track of time. Been so many places, took one too many turns if I tried to go back I'd end up somewhere else. That is not an option. I'm living with my fate, the choices I made.
Didn't I realize they'd effect me?
What am I doing now?
Will it fire back at me later?
Why am I here?
What did I do to deserve what I have been given?
Life?
What is life?
Happiness?
What happiness?
Why so many questions? I don't have any answers and it's unbearable.
Everyday I bring a knife to my throat watch the blood drip, drop by drop into your mouth satisfying your never ending hunger. It's draining me, I'm almost dead. You say you love me but demand more, more and more. Can't you see you are killing me? Is that love? You say everything happens because of our own actions, that nothing is anybody's fault. But I feel expected to do the things I am doing.
Why can't I be be myself?
Is it because I enjoy the feeling of dying?
Because crying is the only way I sleep at night?
The beauty runs down my cheeks, it was all a fake, a mistake, an illusion for myself. I need to get this poison out of me but I can't, so I compress it. This brick I've made, break the walls, shatter glass, the looking glass, windows to the past.  Forget about it all, I can't get it back.